Disability Grant To Help Schizoaffective And Bipolar John Live More Normally
by John Wray
(Grove City, PA, USA)
I am a 53 year-old male, living with my mother, 76, in Grove City, Pennsylvania. I am the main income for our household. I have two older siblings, both living in other states.
Serving in the USA Air Force from 1979 to 1983, I was stationed at the Pentagon in Arlington, Virginia, and Carswell Air Force Base in Fort Worth, Texas. I was a computer operator supervisor at both locations.
Receiving my G.E.D. in 1983, I further pursued my education at Bryan Institute, in Arlington, Texas for computer programming. After I had ingrained the operating aspects with my technician training and programming skills, there seemed only one other place to go.
There was only one logical course of action. I enrolled at ITT in Arlington, Texas and got my electronics background. Now I had a well-rounded skill set for computers.
I am 100% mentally disabled with Bipolar and schizoaffective disorders. I have always had difficulties maintaining jobs, relationships and my temper. Starting at about twenty-eight, my disorders became debilitating, barring me from any kind of social life.
Currently on eight psychological medications, my psychiatrist has found a pill cocktail that works quite well for me. Still, not all days are good.
Medication Mix for Bipolar Disorder
Some days are bad, to the point of conniption fits and yelling, with the guilt and embarrassment that follows. Then there are days of depression. This depression is like a bottomless tar pit where everything seems hopeless.
I continue to work with my therapist and psychiatrist to manage my mental state. Knowing I need to stay on the medications for life, if I want relationships, social skills and friends. I always try to maintain a healthy outlook on life. Rarely, my outlook is actually better that other people.
It is here that I will mention that all my medications have a "may cause dizziness" label on them, and they do cause dizziness. This makes it impossible to stand with my eyes not focused on visual cues.
The causes of not having visual cues range from drinking that last drop of milk from a glass, to washing my face and hair in the shower. This has a bearing on my needs.
I also have severe sciatic nerve problems and my mother has severe back problems. This prevents us from doing ordinary household chores that our neighbors do with ease. This also has a bearing on my needs.Financial Hardship
Struggling with a monthly income from SSD, these past nine years have been financially frustrating. I live paycheck to paycheck. I bought a house two years ago because it was cheaper than renting.
With my old car needing frequent repairs, I finally found a newer car that I can afford about a year ago. It was a question of paying perpetual repair bills or a lesser payment for a newer car.
Between the house, utilities and transportation bills, there is little money left for food, entertainment, clothing and anything else. Snow shoveling and lawn mowing are two expenses because of our back problems.
My dental coverage is minimal through Medicare and Medicaid. The VA also offers minimal coverage. I have dental issues, not covered, which are currently outside my financial range. I only have four upper molars, that being part of the problem.
A computer person by trade, I rely heavily on an outdated computer and software. This negates my ability to do my work, which could lead to some supplemental income. A new computer that will not be outmoded in three years is above my reach.Income Efforts
At one point since my disability, I worked nights as a restocker at Wal-Mart for additional income, but had difficulty coping. It did not work out, and I have been reluctant to seek employment with a company again.
I have received donations through a church to help with the first year in my house. My old car simply drained the bankbook with repairs. I did not feel right about getting a donation, though.
I take small computer jobs when I can. They are rare, and this does not generate a substantial income. Most of the time, the "Barter" method is used for payment.Specific Needs
I will need five grants to cover the following:
1) Dental for two bridges, one per side, to span the gaps between my front and rear upper molars.
2) Pay off my car. This will free up about two hundred dollars a month.
3) Install a walk-in tub in my bathroom. Because I cannot stand without visual cues, I need to kneel down to wash my hair and face, causing leg cramps, potential slipping and wear and tear on my knees, which are painful.
4) Purchase parts for a new mid-range computer, which I will build, that will not be obsolete in a few years.
5) Purchase dBase (version 10) programming language. This will allow me to write programs that work with all Windows versions.Business Idea
I want to start computer programming in dBase again as a means of income. I have been programming in dBase, on the side, on and off since 1984.
The version of dBase I have (version 6.4) is limited to Windows XP and below, necessitating dBase version 10 and a newer computer.
I wish to continue a software project that has been on hold for two years. It is recipe software with a novel approach to finding the perfect recipe. I have not seen this approach in any other recipe software package.
My project needs rekindling. It is my hope to start a small business in order to market this recipe software. I have put over two thousand hours into this project, putting it about halfway through of the writing phase.