Business Grant For PTSD Disabled Wendy To Pursue Fashion Accessory Idea
by Wendy Hatfield
(Hampton, Nova Scotia, Canada)
I am a woman of color, 49 years of age. I come from a large, poor, dysfunctional family of eight kids. I'm third youngest. There's no biological father in the picture.
I successfully raised two children who are now young adults with lives of their own, children of their own. I am a grandmother of five.
My 27-year-old daughter who is a single mom of three (twins are eight, baby is three) graduated from Policing College.
My son is 29 years of age, spent six years in the military, then decided to get out so he could be actively involved with, and around his children, daily.
I could not be more proud of them! They believe in "family first" and provide superb stability and leadership to their children. Family values and unconditional love... that matters.
I was diagnosed with PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) in 2005.
Prior to this, since 1999, I have suffered from depression, and been on medication, daily.
I also have fibromyalgia.
Adult life started early on for me, and my journey has been a struggle.
Starting at age 16, I suffered abuse that would continue for nine years. Broken bones, broken jaw, black eyes, bruised body, as well as cigarette burns to my body, with scars that are still a constant reminder, today.
I was beaten while pregnant, and left lying in my own pool of blood. I was young and naive. He had complete control over me.
I thought he would change, especially after our first child was born. I longed to "belong," to be loved, to be a family.
Day after day, month after month, year after year, it only escalated. (He was a drug-user and an alcoholic.)
I learned to walk on eggshells, not say a word to set him off. I got real good at hiding my black eyes with make-up. I feared nighttime and the dark.
I would lie in bed praying that he not come home.
I couldn't go anywhere without him. When I would try, there would be big consequences.
I could not eat. I was scared to sleep and eventually I became anemic. They say opposites attract. We were total opposites! I think I was just attracted to "the bad."
From an early age I felt "misplaced," and I think this had a huge impact on my wanting to belong, my wanting to be loved.
Nearing the end of that nine-year relationship I had reached out, and sought counseling for myself. I was so worn out, exhausted and sore. I just wanted out.
I got out, took my two children and got an apartment. I told him he could see his children as often as he wanted to, but that he and I would no longer be together as a couple ever again.
This only worked for about a couple of weeks. One evening I made plans to go out with a female friend I had met in the building. My brother had volunteered to come over and baby-sit my children.
When I came home that evening and walked into my apartment, he grabbed me, locked the door and held a knife up to my chin.
He had somehow convinced my brother that all was good, everything was fine between us, that my brother could leave and he would watch the children.
In all the years I had never seen this crazed look on his face. His eyes were huge, his voice was different and he was totally in another zone!
He told me there was going to be no life without him! That moment I knew, I saw it in his eyes, that this was it, I was going to die if I could not think fast!
He assured me the children were fine. He even lead me to the bedroom to see for myself... still at knifepoint. Then he led me to the sofa.
I apologized to him for leaving him, told him I loved him still, and that we would get back together and live as a family.
This took hours and hours of convincing, all night in fact. He was getting tired and slowly dozing off a bit at a time, and I think I had convinced him enough that everything would be alright.
It was early morning when I could get out from his arms, as he had finally fallen asleep. I ran upstairs to my neighbor and called the police.
This is all documented and on record, and he was charged with unlawful confinement with a deadly weapon.
These nine years took a toll on my mind, body and health. I was traumatized.
I still have nightmares, panic attacks and feelings of anxiety. I'm still scared of nighttime, the dark. I often cry uncontrollably.
Because of being anemic for so long, it lead to an emergency hysterectomy in 1999.
He died in 1995 in a motorcycle accident. My two children were left fatherless at a very early age.Financial Hardship
I live on $755 per month, with $500 going to rent, $220 to food (I have 2 dogs) and $35 for personal items. Not one penny to spare.
When I have needed a piece of clothing or a haircut, a winter coat, boots, I have had to turn to the Baptist church for help.
I do not get any travel funds.
Four months ago I broke my right leg in two places, and had to have surgery. This has further added to my already existing conditions.
I have no transportation and have to rely on others.Income Efforts
I've always had many creative talents, natural talents and abilities, as well as acquired skills. My natural talents and abilities were seen from a very early age, in elementary school years.
I loved to read, to write and lead in class. One teacher in particular took interest in my gifts, and often encouraged me.
I won English awards, editor's choice awards and several writing contests. I've written / published two children's books, published poetry in anthologies, magazine articles as well as written/made my own greeting cards.
The two children's books you can find online: Raven's Revenge (By Piper Christmas) Raven In The Cornfield (Piper Christmas). That is my "pen name."
I have never sold/made any money to date on these books, as I have never been able to purchase a set number in order for me to go out to bookstores and promote!
When I needed a piece of home furniture I would get it at the thrift store and totally transform it by stripping, painting, and decorating it. Everyone always loved my creations!
When I tried to start a little business for myself doing this, every attempt to get funding failed.
When I wanted to start a small farm/greenhouse operation, had mentors and family members, community farmers that were willing to give their time and experience, guidance to help me, again I would be turned down for funding.
I wanted to do a B&B, meet people, clean, show superb hospitality, give guests home-made jelly and craft as a thank you gift, again, I was turned down for funding.
I had created a proposal for government agencies that I submitted to specific departments such as HRDC, which showed how to build/ get employment for Persons With Disabilities ONLY.
It was called LONG (Ladder Of New Gain). I received an email back from one department only saying they were not looking for proposals.Specific Needs
I need personal grant funding for: clothing and medical expenses.
I need business grant funding for: equipment, computer, all-in-one industrial printer/scan/fax, display booths, portable tables, display racks, materials, pamphlets, posters, travel, consultant, as well as manufacturing and distribution.Business Idea
I have created a women's fashion accessory for which I have a U.S. Provisional Patent.
My goal is to get this consumer product onto store shelves. Manufacturing and distribution is over $250,000.
Once I get my product out there, it will create demand, which ultimately will allow me to snag a licensing deal.
I have a manufacturing and distribution company already in place. They did my 2D and 3D renderings.
One is required to have a minimum number of units manufactured in order for the company to provide the distribution.
This would allow me to work towards my goal of being self-sufficient, self-employed, in a better place, financially.